My Mom's Coping Skills.... by Sean Lehning

  NOTE:  I thought I'd do something different today and let Sean speak for himself....  Enjoy. 

           Sometimes, people annoy and irritate me with their words and actions. Sometimes, that person is my mom. 90% of the people in my life have done something at least once that I didn’t like. But that’s mostly because I only see that other 10% for a short time each day or don’t interact with them much in general.

My Mom annoyed me today when Ashley, my 6-year-old sister who went with me to music therapy today, had a meltdown near the music therapist. My Mom smiled a fake smile. She says she does this to be positive in a negative situation. To me, when she smiles in a negative situation, it seems like she’s pretending the bad situation is just a cruel joke of sorts. 

I have two general rules for my facial expressions:

1. When something exciting happens (being rushed in a game, playing an intense sport), I smile
2. When something bad happens (a pet dying, hearing bad news that personally affects me), I look angry and sad at the same time.

So when something bad and exciting happens, I smile like a madman. It’s just natural to me to make an expression like that. But I’ve never really gotten why Mom fakes a smile when there is something bad going on.

Now I know. But I don’t care. Because I am very tolerant of what people do and say. I accept people for who they are, because I know what’s it’s like to criticized for being you as an individual. I can put up with other people’s crap for so long, and when I can’t, I’ll meltdown for a few minutes then go back to normal.

I’ve never really bothered to ask Mom why she fakes smiles in bad situations, but now I know she is just trying to be positive. And I can accept that. If that is how she copes with bad situations that way, I’m okay with it. Because if it works for her, I’ll be happy she deals with the situation instead of just sitting there. I learned something about my mom today that satisfied one of my questions, and I love her, regardless of how she deals with bad situations.