Friday, May 27, 2011

Writing Angry.... Not So Much

I wanted to post yesterday but Rich said I shouldn't.

"You're angry.  You don't write well when you're angry."

"Oh.... how do I write then?" I asked thinking of how many bouquets from the grocery store this was going to garner.

"You write angry..."

Hmmmm... I thought I was simply being real.  A good days, bad days kind of thing.

I was exhausted and overwhelmed so I did what needed to get done and went to bed early (if 12:45 am can be called "early").

Yesterday was all about details.  Details, details, details.  Our lives revolve around details - no different than parents of typical kids.

But when we forget one, it could lead to a meltdown, a bad day, a loss of goals.  It could mean the difference between integrating now or integrating later or possibly never.

Thus, details - even the most minute - take on an Everest-sized significance.

Today it's 10:30 am and I just cracked my second Pepsi and my car is on E.  It's going to be a long day.

But it will be nothing like yesterday....

I was up and running long before I usually am.  Sean had a recipe contest/demonstration speech to do at school.  I couldn't cook well if Julia Child was cloned into my DNA.  Thus, Sean decided to demonstrate how his mom makes microwave popcorn... as opposed to how Dad makes real popcorn and starts a kitchen fire.

The premise was actually quite amusing.

But it meant me making bag after bag of microwave popcorn and portioning them off into individual Ziplocs for the all the tasters before 7am.  Popcorn for breakfast, anyone?  Then came the toughest part of the task - at Sean's insistence - cramming all of it PLUS books PLUS his lunchbox into his backpack!

So much for fluffy white puffs....

While I was pretending to be Orville Redenbacher, Sean was getting dressed.  It was cold - lower 40's - so I pulled out a pair of red sweatpants for him to wear.  He has other colours - black, gray - but the red ones fit him well and I figured he would ditch them for the shorts that I knew he was going to wear underneath as soon as time allowed.

If he's going to lose something at school, I'd rather it not be his good clothes...

I let him choose his shirt...

He came into the kitchen wearing his favourite t-shirt....  The green one.

Christmas once again...

Back again to the bedroom to help him pick out a shirt.  Deodorant?  Not until I tell him...

All this is going on while I wake Carissa up and do my best to not forget any of the details of her life.  Manning the school store means she'll have to be dropped off early.  Don't forget the permission slips for French and chorus - the two specialty classes she'll be taking when she attends the junior high in the fall.  Oh, and the big 5th grade outing to the water park... don't forget to put that slip into her backpack.

Her school has a full day of workshops at the end of the year for the children - cake decorating, soccer, kite making, meet the police dog, etc - and I have been one of the helpers preparing things at home.

The bag containing the last of those projects needs to go to school and be dropped at the front office.

Yet another detail.....

It was a maddening morning but everything was falling into place.  You would think that much could have been achieved the night before but I had to work late.  Not everything can be done or discussed before going to bed in my world.

Thus, my morning...

Like I said, it was frantic but things were coming along.

And then I dropped Sean off at school.  He slammed the car door and then fast-walked through the rain.

We left his watch at home.


With the integration meeting for the fall a mere 24 hours away, all I could think of was Sean getting in trouble for running in the halls because we had forgotten his watch.

"Please don't..." I said aloud in my car as I drove away.

I don't know who I was more angry with at that moment... myself for forgetting a detail or the details themselves.

My mind was spinning.  I decided to call it a day and do something that I didn't have to think about.

Laundry and dishes... here I come!

Sometimes when Life is so full of unknowns, getting that last bit of laundry folded and put away, or the last dish dried and in the cabinet, can be oh so satisfying.....

As it turns out, everything went OK.  The speech was amusing.  Papers were turned in on time.  The day of workshops proceeding as planned.

And integration is.... well....

A couple of hours ago, we learned that Sean will be going full-time to the junior high come August.  It's well ahead of schedule and certainly something that, at times, we didn't dare to dream.

I guess then the worry and anger of yesterday were all for nothing.

But, actually, they were for something....

I got my laundry and dishes done. 

Sometimes, you have to wonder... Who could ask for anything more?

Have a safe and enjoyable holiday weekend everyone!  See you next week....

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